30 Oct

It seems where ever you go in the special needs community, there are these guides and rules and “You must do THIS” list of ways to be the best possible special needs parent EVER!

I happened to stumble across one of these just now – a list of Important Things one should do when they have a special needs child.

First thing on the list – “Get a proper diagnosis early.”

Well, I failed that one.

Good think I’m okay with that kind of failure.  I also failed the “find your organizations/support groups” one, as those hinge on the “proper diagnosis” one.

It’s okay, I’ll chuck it all in with all those other things a Good Mother is supposed to do.  Like “Read to your child in utero or else they’ll be born hating books”, “start solids with vegetables or they’ll hate them for LIFE!”, and of course, “sleep training your infant “.  Those also go with all the crafts I never did with them, and the Elf on the Shelf “magical childhood experience” (seriously, what is up with that elf?  How freaky is that thing?  He’s going to make elves the new clowns when it comes to creatures that were supposed to be “fun” but are now freaky scary as they crawl across the floor with the intent to chew off your face…)

Wait, where was I?

Oh yeah, failing.

My kids learned how to sleep through the night, how to read, eat veggies despite having fruits as their first foods, and have never complained about the lack of Elf Magic in our house.  I’ve also managed to go to bat for Maura without that diagnosis.

The lesson here?

It’s okay to be a failure according to someone’s magical motherhood chart as long as you know you’re getting a gold star in real life. Because those rules?  Aren’t always applicable.  Some babies don’t sleep well.  Some kids don’t get a proper diagnosis.  And the elf on that shelf is really freaking creepy.

seriously, the elf is evil...I'm sure of it!

seriously, the elf is evil…I’m sure of it!

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6 Responses to “#FAIL”

  1. edens October 30, 2013 at 5:14 pm #

    Thanks that just made my day!

    Sent from my iPhone


  2. Angie James October 30, 2013 at 6:21 pm #

    My son didnt get a “proper diagnosis” until he was 6(PDDNOS) then another at 10(Bi-Polar and Childhood Schizoprenia), another at 11(ADHD,OCD,ODD) and yet another 5 months ago(PDDNOS got changed to Aspergers)……Now he has6 mental health dx and along with Epilepsy, Asthma,An Immune Disorder, Heart Issues and IBS….Which dx is the proper one?? Needless to say they all make for interesting days. My life is never boring, but I love it even if the world thinks Im failing……Maybe those of us who are failing should start our own club 🙂

  3. Joan T Warren October 30, 2013 at 10:34 pm #


  4. Bright Side of Life October 31, 2013 at 9:09 am #

    I don’t like rules and I definitely do NOT follow the crowd! Good post. 🙂

  5. saracvt October 31, 2013 at 12:47 pm #

    SERIOUSLY?? You’re supposed to read to them in utero to make them love books? How about you read to them AFTER they’re born, let them see YOU reading, and take them to bookstores and libraries? That might explain why both my 10-year-old daughters, though never read to in utero (I was too busy throwing up) read at a high-school level.

    Oh, and the diagnosis thing? These people must not have much real-world experience, because most of the really good doctors I’ve met are reluctant to give a young child a firm diagnosis. One of my twins is very likely bipolar, and even at 10, her team is hesitating because of her youth. Despite clearly psychotic behaviors.

    And yes, the elf is evil and creepy. I’m inexpressibly glad someone else sees this. A good friend of mine last Christmas bought a GIRLFRIEND ELF for her Elf and it creeped me the h*#& out. I felt so sorry for her kids.

  6. Lori-Anne November 2, 2013 at 8:45 pm #

    YES!!!! ,,,to all you wrote! especially the Elf on the Shelf. I don’t get it. It’s creepy. You are not alone! 🙂

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