Maura likes to tell us what to do, and always expects us to do what she wants. I know we’re pretty much the reason why, we do have a tendency to spoil the girl, not to mention how we go around trying to get her to use words, so that if she actually vocally asks for something, we’re usually quick to give her just that.
Honestly, it’s a surprise she hasn’t asked for a pony and her own pink convertible yet.
The problem comes in when we’re not quick to respond. She’ll instruct us, and if we don’t do it right then, she will start moving our bodies in ways to make us do that.
Example A – Maura wants to watch a show. “Penguins!” she’ll state, thrusting the remote in my hand.
Example B – Maura wants to go a different direction in the mall. I say “No, we need to go this way.” She takes my hand and tries to pull me in the direction she wants to go.
Example C – Josh comes home from work. Maura gives him a big hug, then goes “Mom! Daddy!” – as in “Look Mom, Dad’s home, go hug him now!” – and then shoves me at Josh, because we should be hugging too.
It is nice that she wants to keep the romance alive in the marriage. But if, say, I’m in the middle of dealing with dinner, and have a hand full of raw chicken or am holding a big chopping knife, it’s not always the best time for me to turn and hug anyone.
Maura doesn’t get this though. And so she’ll try to push me in the right direction, or move my arms.
Which is why I’ve started responding with “Not now Puppetmaster!”
I should probably shorten Puppetmaster to something cute and British, like Poppet, since “Puppetmaster” sounds a bit more sinister than “Poppet”. But really, she is trying to pull every string, and make us do her will – in short, she really is a Puppetmaster. I just have to decide how much I’ll actually play along with this.