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Newsflash – Local Girl Spots Display of “Frozen” Stuff, Loses Her Mind

5 Nov

Remember how in my post earlier today (was it just today???) where I told Maura I’d take her for shoes after school?

Yeah.  That was a mistake.

We went to Payless – with all its shoes – because hey! Cheap shoes!  We can get a couple pairs!

But no.  There were no shoes she liked.  There was, however, a whole crap-ton of Frozen crap to buy.  Little Frozen purses.  Little Frozen shoes.  Little Frozen stretchy gloves.  Little Frozen umbrellas.  Big Frozen bows.  Little Frozen jewelry.

And that’s when Maura lost her damn mind.

She’s not really a fan of Olaf, but suddenly she HAD to have the Olaf umbrella.  That led to a slight wrestling match and a pinched thumb (mine of course.)  Then she wrestled a purse off the rack.  Fine.  We’ll get a purse.  She tried on the hat, but it was too small.  She started wandering the store, looking for the shoes.  The glorious sparkly shoes with Frozen faces on them.

Of course they weren’t in her size.

My eldest child called to talk about something.  I had to cut him short.  “Sorry, gotta go before your sister shoplifts something.” as Maura ripped the paper out of the purse to shove the Frozen gloves into.

I gave Maura the lecture about buying it before putting stuff in the purse.  Maura’s usually very good about buying stuff.  She’s got that concept down.

But, thanks to the plethora of Frozen crap, she lost her damn mind.

Lost. It.

There was a line.  We were fourth in line.  The vibe in the store was a bit moody, even without us.  The cashier was being a bit snippy to a customer, who in return was trying to get a discount on all 47 items she was buying or returning or whatever.  I don’t know – all I know is, the entire time Maura was going mad over Frozen gear, this woman and the cashier were going at it over discounts and coupons.

Then Maura decided once again that she neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeded an umbrella.  Mind you, long umbrellas have been banned from school for her since she hit an aide with one.  And again, it was just Olaf.  Her order of preference is Elsa, Elsa, Elsa and Anna, Elsa Anna and others, Elsa, Anna, then Olaf.  She was in a “Buy ALL the things!” mode, and about to melt down quickly.

I just didn’t realize how quickly.  For a moment later, she let out a war cry and ran out the door, setting off the alarms.

By the way, if you ever try to shoplift from Payless, their alarm system comes with lights.

I took off after her with a “No!”, registering the shocked looks on everyone’s faces and hoping they had gotten the gist of the situation.  I caught up to Maura outside, where she did her drop to the ground, retrieved the now-stolen items from her, told her how that was not acceptable in a stern voice, left her screaming her tantrum on the sidewalk – safely – as I popped open the door to the store (setting off the alarms again, awesome) and said “I’m just going to leave these here.” and tossed the contraband on a display table.

The cashier just nodded, a bit wide-eyed.

I hefted Maura off the sidewalk and marched her back to our car, giving her the “We don’t take things from stores without paying for them” lecture as she howled.  She howled some more in the car as I told her we were not going back for the Frozen stuff, throwing a fit, taking off her seat belt and generally being horrible.  just waited it out.  After a few minutes, she calmed down and I said “Do you want to try another store for shoes?”

“Yes.”

So down the shopping center we went – to the Sears.  Little Miss Jekyll and Hyde got out of the car all giggles and smiles, wiping tears away and thrilled to be going to Sears.

“You are going to be the death of me child.” I said to her.

She laughed.

We found shoes at Sears.

Then we went to Five Guys, because all that shoplifting and tantrum throwing makes a budding criminal hungry.

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4 Responses to “Newsflash – Local Girl Spots Display of “Frozen” Stuff, Loses Her Mind”

  1. Chris November 5, 2014 at 9:50 pm #

    I blame it on the Moon….. Just sayin’ I love you and your girl.

    Sent from my iPad

    >

  2. franhunne4u November 6, 2014 at 2:43 am #

    You are a very strong mom! I hope you are ready for the bad news: Maura is in puberty. No denying that. Just look at the photo again – she starts developing a female figure. STARTS … but still – the hormones are active now. In centuries ago I would have advised to stock up on Laudanum (alcohol and opiate, to “calm the nerves”), with today’s knowledge about addiction it has to be valerian tea!

  3. J. Johnson November 6, 2014 at 7:48 am #

    Your blog post reminded me of the time I had to carry my screaming son out of Chuck E. Cheese because he wouldn’t stop pushing children out of the way of his favorite game (he is autistic). To encourage you, he is now 20, and we’ve gotten his behavior mostly under control. I haven’t had to carry him out of a Chuck E. Cheese for many years now!

  4. Renee Anne November 6, 2014 at 10:54 am #

    Oh dear 😦

    What is it about Frozen that makes kids lose their damn minds?! Little Man (who will be 4 on Sunday) has only seen part of it once (and he wasn’t really paying attention)…..but he sees Olaf and he’s all over it and he’ll even mention other non-Olaf-Frozen-related items (Elsa/Ana shirts in the girls’ section at Target, for example). I tried so hard to keep that out of the house. We have no Frozen items and we do not have the movie. I’ve seen it (in the theater, even!)……and it’s cute….but no no no. NO Frozen in my house.

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