New here? Well come on in, I hope you brought coffee

29 May

Just kidding. I have coffee for EVERYONE! Or at least 23 of you.

If you’ve reached this blog because of my latest rambling rant on why I will wear what I want because I’ve hit the magical age of “don’t fecking care”, let me tell you more about myself and this blog and why you totally want to stay around.

What’s this blog about?

Life. My life. My crazy weird unique life. We all have one, but I like to think that our life has that extra bit of sparkle. Life with teens, life with ridiculous but pretty dogs, life interrupted, life as a special needs mom, life as someone trying to become a paid professional writer

Who am I?

A forty-something wife and mom of four. A college graduate who finally paid off her student loans just in time to send her offspring to college. My spirit animal is a sloth. Totally not a perfectionist. I lovingly embrace my diagnosis of anxiety and have no shame when I talk about my bottle of Prozac. I’m bad at accepting compliments. My morning is incomplete until I get a cup of coffee in my hand. I can quote SpongeBob more than Shakespeare. I love to read.

You said special needs – what’s up with that?

My daughter has a disability of the unknown variety. Yes, we’ve seen doctors and specialists. Yes, we’ve done tests. No, we haven’t done a full genetic panel because, well, it wasn’t possible back in the day and now I run into the idea of “Well, she’s made it this long, just accept her as she is.” (Yes, that doctor got a side eye from me. No, we did not go back to see him ever again.) No, it’s not autism, unless it’s a really odd form of autism where you excel at social skills. What she does have is an intellectual disability. On paper, my daughter seems very disabled. In real life, she’s a beautiful mix of skills that never fails to impress people. And I talk about her a lot. Because back in the day, we were the only ones dealing with no diagnosis, and it was lonely and scary. I don’t want anyone else to feel that way. Because we’re not alone.

Got any fun facts?

Besides being born in a Mercedes and a drug bust after my wedding rehearsal? (What, you didn’t know about that? Go back through the handy dandy links I’ve provided in this post if you’re curious.)

Well, I recently made a taxi full of other women bloggers fall dead silent when I said how my blog was best known for a post called “Being Retarded” – then explained what I meant, and everyone was able to breathe again. Go read the post. Pink and the guy who wrote Zombieland retweeted it. So you should read it too.

We lived in Ireland for 2 1/2 years. Yes, it was a bit crazy to move four kids to Dublin. Yes, it was awesome. Yes, I miss it.

Which leads to the next fun fact – I’m popular amongst homeschooling mums in Ireland AND special education teachers and staff in a corner of Dublin. Also, I have a large following of geek/tech guys.

We’re a Doctor Who loving family. Including Maura – who understands better than a lot of adults that while the Doctor may change faces, he’s always still The Doctor.

I used to not be all that sweary. Then we moved to Ireland. Ironically, I now live in one of the top five least-sweariest states (Washington). Needless to say, I now have an awful potty mouth and accidentally offend people sometimes.

I don’t own a cat. Seriously! We had a cat for a while, and he was an awesome cat. However, I realized that I don’t need to own a cat ever again. Instead, I have a small dog that acts very cat-like at times, and she fulfills any cat need I have.

I’m currently wishing I had more coffee right now.

So that’s a bad summary of this blog. Life, coffee, special needs, dogs, coffee, teens, coffee. Feel free to poke about, stay awhile, convince Starbuck’s that they should sponsor me.

Or, you know, check out my Facebook, or Instagram, or Twitter.



I’m also awful at taking selfies. I tend to look slightly maniacal in them. But my hair’s looking fabulous in this shot!




16 Responses to “New here? Well come on in, I hope you brought coffee”

  1. franhunne4u May 29, 2016 at 12:29 pm #

    No, you really do not need a cat – a calm, purring, silent companion – who will awake you at 4 in the morning. That would not go well – besides you have Maura for surprises early in the morning …

    • phoebz4 May 29, 2016 at 12:29 pm #

      See? You get me 😉

      • franhunne4u May 29, 2016 at 12:32 pm #

        Sometimes. You see, I am not sure if a cat would be so happy with Maura around. Or Maura with a cat. Cats have a tendency to make very clear when they do NOT want attention. Maura would learn that fast – with bleeding hands. Not something Maura, you or a cat would like.

      • phoebz4 May 29, 2016 at 12:34 pm #

        Maura’s actually pretty good with all animals. She gives them a wide berth until shown how to handle them. We’d still have to have a verrrrrry patient cat.

        But mostly, I just don’t want to deal with a litter box ever again.

      • franhunne4u May 29, 2016 at 12:43 pm #

        Well, I got used to it. But with Maura around I would be suspicious. Not that she would be tempted to eat it, would she? But she might want to play with it (imagine her pouring a bucket full of water into it and with a lid nobody – especially not an unsuspecting cat would see that) – or decide to try to pee into that – or whatever your very creative daughter would be able to come up with …
        But if you ever want to give it another go: Choose a ragdoll, they are the tamest cat breed around. And I am not into cat breeds, my two are just normal mongrels. Still, I can understand that you do not want to come near a litter box ever again. My two have litterboxes without lids – the odours coming from there now and then are … overwhelming … and not in a good way.

  2. Renee Anne May 29, 2016 at 2:08 pm #

    I grew up in the land of beer & cheese. I curse like a sailor (which is fine since I now live in San Francisco…except when I offend the….well, let’s just not go there). I read your blog because I’m short student teaching in a degree in K-12 special education with a BA in elementary education and I know you knit (shhhhh! it’s a secret!).

  3. ritterames May 29, 2016 at 3:27 pm #

    I just found your blog yesterday and spent a lot of yesterday evening reading prior posts. Have a (now adult) daughter with audio processing disorder (also called audio dyslexia) that we discovered when she was four–and finally explained that when my husband had been saying for 12 years that he hadn’t heard me say (countless) things, he really hadn’t (we didn’t do genetic testing either, but when she was diagnosed we were told this is genetic, and suddenly my smart husband’s and two of my bright nieces struggles through school made all kinds of sense). And when my daughter was diagnosed it was only through sheer luck, but they still didn’t have any definitive ways to help her other than “keep her really organized and have her team up with another student for assignments.” Twenty years later, they didn’t even yet have a definitive test to gauge a person’s diagnosis (as I understand it, three factions were arguing over whose test was the best). By sixth grade, we gave up and began homeschooling because when she was in class all day she and I had to repeat everything she’d covered again that evening. It was too exhausting–so I quit my corporate job and became a freelance writer and homeschooling mom. Like you, I found humor was the greatest weapon in my arsenal against stress–still feel that way. And while I know it’s all difficult, and Maura has much different issues than my daughter, know that all of us are pulling for you (even new subscribers like me) and we’ve all been there and still are every day. I know you already know that, but I felt compelled to add it. I also adore the stories about Miriam and Collin–what a great family you have–and still laugh when I think about the wee dog getting the haircut and the other dog keeping its distance for a while until it knew the Yorkie with the pixie cut truly was the Yorkie that had the long hair that morning. Now I’m off to find the post reposted by Pink and the Zombieland guy. 🙂

    • phoebz4 May 29, 2016 at 3:31 pm #

      Aw thanks! Welcome to the clan! We’re a fun bunch, as you can already tell.

      • ritterames May 29, 2016 at 3:35 pm #

        Wow! My comment didn’t look this long when I typed it. Thanks for the welcome and I promise to make shorter comments in the future, LOL!

      • phoebz4 May 29, 2016 at 3:37 pm #

        LOL! Don’t worry about it. There’s no word limits in these parts 😉

  4. Just a Gurrl May 30, 2016 at 1:17 am #

    Your teal hair does look amazing! Like a mermaid! I love your sense of humor, and I’m still laughing about the post you wrote about 20-somethings thinking they have the right to tell us what we can or cannot do.

  5. jen erickson May 30, 2016 at 7:43 pm #

    My bestie and I were loose this weekend in the Seattle area and looking for cheap things to do. It was proposed we just go hang in the Redmond Target in hopes of (accidentally) meeting you in person.

    • phoebz4 May 30, 2016 at 7:44 pm #

      Omg!!! Lol!

    • phoebz4 May 30, 2016 at 7:45 pm #

      And truthfully, you might have run into me there lol!

  6. Ysharros May 30, 2016 at 10:49 pm #

    I always bring coffee! You may have to pry it out of my cold dead hands, but I bring it. Absolutely excellent rant — preach it!

  7. Christine June 10, 2016 at 12:29 pm #

    Ireland -Where it pisses rain & people use the f word in creative ways!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: